How can we know which days will be the turning points?~Sarah Crossan (From Here Is The Beehive)

I asked the protagonist in the novel I'm writing, "What are you longing for?" As an author I must know the heart cry of my characters. And she did "speak" to me so that I can continue to write her story.

I longed for margin for at least a decade. A broad place in my life where I had room, space to think, to wonder, to pray, to write. I would get slivers of what I desired, yet it seemed I never entered that spacious location and stayed for more than a few days. There were things to learn. Other places to go.

It is only this week when I mused on my character's longings that I stopped to ponder my own heart's desire. Caused me to appreciate the moments I experienced turning points over that decade of days.

Almost one year ago, I was planning for retirement.  I couldn't wait, honestly. The margin and spaciousness to live a less hurried pace beckoned me. Now, though, I understand more fully that I couldn't have handled the boundless territory I found myself in without the decade of preparation. Over these last years, I've gathered  tools that fill my backpack, equip me to live in the place I'd longed for. Spiritual implements include: Letting go of "shoulds" and a legalistic mindset; expecting God's grace in all circumstances; increasing love for the Word; viewing myself and others as the "beloved of God"; valuing my dreams in the night watches and keeping track of them; journaling my feelings and prayers, recording God's mercy in my life. Mental, physical and emotional health essentials include: increasing assertiveness and the ability to set boundaries; learning breathing techniques to better help me relax; learning to re-focus negative thought patterns to more positive, powerful, life-affirming ways of thinking; practicing healthier eating; valuing physical movement; nurturing safe family and social relationships; increasng financial poise and planning. Radical acceptance of issues that bring me pain while simultaneously being grateful. In a nutshell, years of practicing better spiritual, mental, physical and emotional self-care.

I sense God provided me these years of practice so that I can now be overwhelmed by His goodness rather than be inundated by the vastness of the broad place He allows me to inhabit. He couldn't fully quench the depth of my longing until He provided the equipment I'd need to triumph in the enormity of His gift to me--like a child not given a substantial inheritance until she is mature enough to manage the wealth. 

What do you long for? 

BLESSING FOR OUR LONGINGS

Our hearts do long. For love. For comfort. For direction. For rest. For purpose.

And the world is noisy with its pulls and pleading. Our longings go quiet. We cry out to God, "What is going on?"

What if we got still? What if we let silence prevail? Let the clamor and din of the world subside.

Might that be a turning point? To Him, even silence is praise.

He desires to lead us into the sanctuary where a feast of mercy resides. No matter the circumstances, we are satisfied because we are near Him.

He is the God who helps us like a good father. He brings us into a broad place. 

He has longings too. For us.

AMEN